Are You The Rescuer In Your Relationship? Whenever a drama occurs in a relationship, people can step into specific roles. This was defined by Dr…
Is Your Inner Child Hurting? Ten Signs To Check
Do you let your inner child run wild and free? Do you ever play uninhibitedly, just for fun? Do you ever skip instead of walk, splash through puddles or jump into leaves?
We all have an inner child that wants to have fun and play, but when we carry painful experiences from our childhood with us into adulthood, this playful side can often become lost. Consequently, making it harder to experience happiness, enjoy relationships or feel comfortable and truly fulfilled.
If you feel like you’ve lost the fun spontaneity you had as a child, then you can help to heal your inner child. But first, how can you tell if your inner child is hurting? In this post, I’ll share some of the key signs which indicate that your inner child needs some attention.
What Is My Inner Child?
The inner child is the part of your mind that craves fun, spontaneity and excitement. It is creative and sensitive. It is the part of the psyche that feels inspired and invigorated. However, when you are disconnected from the inner child, you can feel bored, unhappy and unfulfilled.
The inner child links back to your childhood experiences. If you have felt hurt, anger or fear as a child, this may be manifesting in your present as your inner child continues to hurt. Consequently, your inner child may be responsible for your emotional patterns, behaviours and complexes.
Everything you are right now comes from your learning, experiences and beliefs as a child. As you age, you gain more experience and knowledge. However, often this doesn’t change your childhood learnings. Instead, journeying into adulthood may mean you suppress or neglect your childhood self. This inner child is still within you, despite it perhaps feeling locked away. However, as your inner child can help you to feel fun, excited and happy, it should continue to be nurtured and protected.
Is Your Inner Child Still Hurting? Ten Ways To Check
1. Low Self Esteem
If you never feel ‘good enough’ and continuously criticise yourself, then this is a key trait of someone whose inner child is still hurting. You may have a lack of confidence in your abilities and not trust your own actions and convictions. In some cases, this can lead to issues with body image, such as developing eating disorders.
2. Boundary Management
Your inner child may mean that you struggle to create clear boundaries. In some cases, this may manifest as a lack of limits, where you don’t feel you can say no and can often lead to feeling taken advantage of. Alternatively, you may have high boundaries, where you don’t let anyone in. This can make it difficult to feel close to anyone, and you may struggle to forge meaningful relationships.
Another sign of childhood trauma could be a trait of being clingy and needy. You may be continually looking for approval or attention. Alternatively, you can find that you struggle to let go of anything and anyone. You may feel unable to give people the space they crave, and with this, you may find it challenging to be alone.
4. Emotional Mismanagement
Challenging or strong emotions may be incredibly difficult for you to manage. This can manifest as a difficulty controlling anger or perhaps finding that you cry very easily. Alternatively, you may find that you shut down during confrontations and actively avoid all forms of conflict. Again, this can all stem from an issue during childhood.
5. Competitive Perfectionist
If you are always striving to be the best and have perfectionist tendencies, then this can be another sign of a hurting inner child. You may find it difficult to respond to defeat, and you may firmly believe that failure is not an option.
6. Personality And Identity
Often, you can find that you adapt so much to different groups of people that you don’t have a strong sense of self. It may feel natural to simply change who you are and how you act based on who you’re with. As a result, you might not know who you really are and what you stand for.
7. Social Anxiety
Another key indicator is that you struggle to be around other people. Social situations may cause anxiety. You might try to avoid gatherings or encountering people. Instead, you prefer the comfort of home and the security it provides.
8. Addictive Tendencies
One of the most prevalent signs of a hurting inner child is a quick attachment or addictive, obsessive tendencies. For example, you could find yourself becoming addictive or attached to things such as social media, drinking, smoking and gambling. These addictive tendencies are often a sign that you’re seeking out feel-good hormones and the rush that comes with it.
9. Antagonistic Behaviour
Another sign your inner child is ruling your head is through rebellious behaviour patterns. This can manifest as being deliberately antagonistic or argumentative. People with these behaviour patterns typically feel energised during conflict and will find ways to engage in rebellious activities.
10. Controlled Comfort Zone
Change can feel very difficult. As a result, you may go out of your way to remain consistent and with a strict schedule. Change can make you feel very anxious, and you may have a hard time adjusting to it. As a result, you can cling to your comfort zone and avoid trying anything new.
Does Your Inner Child Need Healing?
In next week’s post, I’ll discuss the ways that you can help to heal your inner child. However, if you’d like a personalised plan as to how to heal and manage your inner child, then get in touch. Please email me on email@example.com to book your first free consultation and to discuss the next possible steps.